To many, this picture will look like just another family photo. But to me, it’s a reminder of the faithfulness of God to keep His promises.
Psalm 68:6 says God sets the lonely in families. He leads out the prisoners with singing.
There are probably many words to describe my childhood and teen years—broken, insecure, selfloathing—but perhaps near the top of that list would be lonely. And Christmas simply amplified that feeling as I went off to college and spent several Christmases without family.
When I look at this photo, I can’t help but be overwhelmed by the goodness of God. It represents a fulfillment of the deep desires of my heart: to have a family, and not a family bound together by trauma—not one who fought and bickered—but one who loved each other and loved the Lord. This family laughs together. We sit around the table and actually enjoy being with each other. We eat together, laugh together, and when conflict comes (because it does), we work through it with grace instead of walking away or tearing each other down. The love here isn’t conditional or fragile—it’s rooted in something bigger than all of us.
And God in His goodness gave me just that. We’re not perfect in any way, but we do love each other and we love the Lord.
So my advice to anyone lonely is this: plant your life in a local church. Please note—planting is different than attending. Attending is showing up when it’s convenient. Planting is committing to a community even when it’s hard, even when you don’t feel like it, even when people disappoint you. It’s showing up consistently, serving in ways that might feel small or unseen, and choosing to invest in relationships that take time to grow. It’s learning to be known, to be vulnerable, to let people see you—not just the polished Sunday morning version, but the real you.
Planting means using the gifts and talents you have for the betterment of those around you. It means weathering some storms together, because that’s where real roots go deep. And in that process, you learn how to be a good friend, how to love imperfect people, how to receive love even when you feel unworthy of it. Those are the skills you’ll need to someday be a good family.
Don’t get married to just anyone to stave off the loneliness, but let God fill the void. I know how strong that urge can be—to just find someone, anyone, to make the loneliness go away. But a marriage built on desperation will only multiply the pain you’re already carrying. Let God do His work in you first. Let Him show you your worth, heal those broken places, and fill you with His love in a way that no person ever could.
Wait for a spouse who will share your values, your God assignment, and then build a beautiful life and family together. The waiting is hard, but it’s not wasted. God is using that time to prepare you, to shape you, to write a story that will one day be a testimony of His faithfulness—just like this photo is for me.